Friday, January 30, 2009
Eyes up here.
They know. They might not always call you out or give you a slap, but they make a note of it and it colors their impression of you. Even if they “want” you to look, you’ll retain the upper hand and gain respect if you resist.
I know it’s a challenge. Boobs are powerful eye magnets. But resisting the urge to stare, drift or even peek is key to establishing your gentlemanship. Imagine that a welcoming few inches of cleavage is a surgical scar or birth mark. We’ve all learned how to avoid staring in those instances. Apply the same techniques. But acknowledge that it’s a sub-rational impulse.
You don’t want to be so focused on not looking down that you end up darting around the room or engaging in creepy prolonged eye contact. Give yourself a break by looking up into your head like your trying to recall something or look at her mouth when she’s talking. That will also bring the boobs into your peripheral vision and enable you to get a sense of them and avoid feeling the need to do a quick check.
Broach the subject or make a joke about it. Even if you think it’s cool.
Get so worked up about not looking that you get flustered or run away.
Give it a second thought. Once you start chanting “don’t look, don’t look, don’t look” in your head, you’re doomed.
Try purposefully engaging your visual attention. Compliment her shoes or hair. In fact, do that all the time.
Take a mental cold shower. Remove sexual undertones by treating her like an aunt, or sister.
Recall a fantastic pair that you’ve seen exposed in the past. With that picture lingering your mind, you won’t feel compelled to catch a glimpse of the mostly covered pair in your presence.
That covers not staring during a direct interface. As for cleavage entering your field of vision and grabbing your attention, God help us. I only have one piece of advice for someone who is in the company of a wife, girlfriend, or female acquaintance who wouldn’t appreciate you checking out another woman. Call immediate attention to it. Point out the cleavage and say something like “What is she wearing?”, “That’s just obnoxious.”, or “That woman looks familiar, where do I know her from?” Then you can look all you want. Soon enough you’ll have your fill and you’ll be able to move on.